Michael Conforti

Michael Conforti is the Director of New Media for the Long Island Press and many of its associated properties. He occasionally writes things. Things like his biographical information for the author excerpt thingy you are reading here. He writes in third person. Mike is awesome.

The Best Pole Dance You Will (Probably) See Today (Yes, it’s SFW)

Pole Dance Video

Pole Dance Video

Ah, the pole dance. Despite its normally-NSFW implications, this strip club staple has spawned a burgeoning exercise and exhibition industry, where the athletic and artistic qualities of a performer are spotlighted, instead of the whole show simply being a conduit to coax dollar bills from ogling patrons.

Now, this video is not new. It’s low resolution. Grainy and sometimes shaky. It takes a little while to get to the good stuff. But we came across it, hadn’t seen it before, and quite honestly, collectively marveled at it.

If you’ve never seen it, here’s what’s probably going to happen.

Click ‘Play’… Think to self, “This better be safe for work”… watch… wait… watch… Say to yourself, “What is this crap?”… wait… watch… Say “Uh oh, that better be all she takes off!”… wait… watch… Continue to be skeptical… Say to yourself, “OK… Here it goes… OK…. That’s cool. She must be strong… Oh cool. Oh. OH! OHH! …. Wow… WOW!” etc., etc.

Her name is Jenyne Butterfly, and she is awesome.

Let us know what you think in the comments.

And don’t try this at home.

(Unless it’s you, Eve.)

Beyonce GQ Cover Leaked: Sexiest Woman of the Century / Millenium / Eternity?

Beyonce GQ cover - Large - February 2013

Beyonce covers GQ’s “100 Sexiest Women of the 21st Century” issue. We can assume it is because she has been given the top spot, a deserved one, as the iconic pop/R&B chanteuse has certainly topped several such lists during her reign atop the charts.

A probably-leaked-on-purpose image of the cover of the issue delivers a slim, toned Beyonce, a bunch of Beyonce skin and Beyonce hands sexily scrunching up some Beyonce hair.

(Grr. How do you do the ‘ over the e in Beyonce.. I’m trying to be official here…)

Anyway. Sexy? Sure. Sexiest? Of the century? Possibly. Sexy ENOUGH? Absolutely.

In any event, such lists are becoming entirely too commonplace, many would say. Top 100 this, bottom 38 that… It’s all subjective, right?

Then again, I think as human men, we can all pretty much agree that Beyonce got it going on. And on. And on.


A discussion with a friend suggested some may not be so convinced.

Friend: Does she even make music anymore?

Me: Does it matter? It’s a sexiest woman list, not a still-makes-music-sexiest-woman list.

Cynical friend: I’m just saying. All she does are Pepsi commercials and sleep with Jay-Z.

Me: And yes. Her album, 4, was released in 2011 and probably reached #1 on every chart imaginable because she is goddesslike.

Misinformed friend: Must have missed that one.

Me: But you caught the Pepsi commercials and are well informed about her sex life?

Lunatic friend: I’m very well informed about her sex life.

Me: I’m telling Jay that you said Beyonce tastes like Honey Nut Cheerios.

That deep and informative discussion aside, we’ll just have to wait until the entire un-leaked edition of GQ’s “100 Sexiest Women of the 21st Century” February issue comes out, but in the meantime, we’ll get our fill of Mrs. -Z performing at the inauguration of President Obama and the Super Bowl halftime show.

Beyonce GQ cover - Large - February 2013