The rituals of Valentine’s begin well before Feb. 14 and linger long after it passes. Around here, I’ve noticed stores filling with heart-themed candy, cards, balloons, and other tokens of affection as soon as the Christmas decorations come down.
Flowers are often sent days — or even weeks — before the big day, with notes that say, “I couldn’t wait to tell you how much I love you.” Special dinners take place throughout the month, planned around crowded restaurants and busy babysitter schedules.
Call me a fan of the extended season. When Valentine’s rituals stretch across the month, they create more chances to deepen relationships and remind the people in our lives that they matter.
Most of all, the extra time invites us to revisit old memories and make new ones along the way, reinforcing the importance of those we love — romantic partners, family members, and friends alike.
Valentine’s Love Lessons
I still remember the Valentine’s rituals of my childhood. In the days leading up to Feb. 14, we carefully cut heart shapes from red construction paper and wrote messages for each of our classmates. After exchanging them, we read and reread what we received, searching for meaning between the lines.
Then came the school dance, complete with decorations, anticipation, and the nervous courage it took to ask someone to dance. It was excellent preparation for later years.
When I came home from school, my mom had her own rituals. Every year, she greeted us with hugs and a box of chocolates. The gesture made that day feel special, but it mattered because it reflected the care and attention that shaped our family all year long.
The Evolution of Rituals
Valentine’s traditions now reflect the many relationships that shape our lives. Galentine’s and Palentine’s, for instance, honor friendships, while workplaces use February as a time to recognize employees and customers.
As a grandfather, I’ve adapted my mother’s tradition and added a twist. Each year, I send Cheryl’s Cookies to my seven grandchildren, making sure they arrive early so the treats can be enjoyed throughout the weeks leading up to Feb. 14. The only requirement is that the parents send back a photo of the little ones.
It’s a small ritual, but it carries a big message: you’re loved, and you’re always on my mind. Plus, I get a photo, too.
All these rituals give us permission to show gratitude for the people who enrich our lives. This Valentine’s, I hope you’ll embrace the traditions — old and new — and use them as an opportunity to celebrate love in all its many forms.
Jim McCann, a Long Island native who is the founder of Jericho-based 1-800-Flowers.com, has been writing the Celebrations Pulse since March 2020. Enjoy what you’ve read? Subscribe to the free weekly edition at celebrations.com/pulse.
